That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Randomize
