we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Randomize