Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize
