He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
