I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
