it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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