Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
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