too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Randomize
