i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
