But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize