If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
