and she was petting her beer can
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
