doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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