Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
love makes seman taste better
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
