me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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