Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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