hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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