If that was your dad, he is hot
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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