I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
