so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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