So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
