All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
When did angry sex become our thing?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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