dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
