no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
