hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
