listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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