nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize