Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
