I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
