how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
