Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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