3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
