so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize