Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize