I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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