sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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