What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
