Need sex. Gaining weight.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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