I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
