There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
