Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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