Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Every concussion has its silver lining
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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