it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
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