I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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