Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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