my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
