I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
