yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
This house was built for laser tag.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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