But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
