Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
There was a lot of him and a little penis
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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