I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
